NIPPY

Southern landlady,
Nippy, spunky at 83,
With 55 lived on this North Carolina beach

Downstairs, she quietly holds vigil
Over the comings and goings of her tenants and the sea.

She rents two units,
Each a little bit of heaven,
With seaside decks and four blue rockers.

Widowed in the 1990s, Nippy has one living son,
Jim, "a lawyer," who has two sons.
Alex is a chief neurology resident at Boston University, and
Cliff is a Winston-Salem "lawyer."

With a gleam in her eye,
Nippy introduced Cliff's wife, GiGi,
A Wake Forest resident,
Internal medicine this one.
"She'll be chief resident next year," said Nippy.

Nippy had another son, Neil,
Who graduated college and
Died climbing rocks.

"At least he died doing something he loved," says Nippy.
"It's easier to accept that way,
Than if he had been killed by a drunk driver or an overdose."

Attending her last high school reunion,
Nippy said, "Everyone introduced themselves as lawyers, doctors, judges and such.
I wondered what on earth I was going to say when came my turn.
Then, it came to me," she laughed. "I said I was in resort rentals.

NORTH CAROLINA BEACH

Arrival,
Ocean greets me.
"Welcome back."
Birds aflutter
Over balcony crumbs,
Long, hot bath,
Yoga stretches,
Seaside serenade,
Bed more comfy than my rumble seat


Addendum: On this trip, for speed and economy, I slept in the back seat of my vehicle.

AUGUST: OSAGE COUNTY

Tracy Letts,
Brilliant,
Comedic,
Sad,
Oklahomans,
We're fair game,
With our burping and slurping.

Beverly, Violet and their kin,
Deep varicose veins of psychopathology,
But, not restricted to them,
Same story, different slang,
From New York to L.A.,
My God,
Haven't they had a belly full yet?



Addendum: On the last leg of my journey, this piece fell from the sky, also known as cosmic downloading. I believe we create our reality by our thoughts, which result in our actions and emotions of like kind. A work of "art" which glorifies the appalling dysfunction of our society, contributes little to the collective healing of the human community.

BACK-SIDE VIEW

Appaloosa and auburn beauties,
Tails flying outside trailer,
Conversation,
"Don't you luv'em,
"Well-trained humans."

COUPLES

Spring,
Sunshine,
Couples in convertibles,

His bald, red head,
Her pink hat behind the wheel,

Flapping blonde hair,
Behind sunglasses,
She's asleep.
He drives intensely.

His black baseball cap and graying goatee,
Her white, sun visor

Sunday afternoon,
"Yearning to breathe free"

ON THE ROAD

Third day,
Hey there,
Sporty, black roadster speeding by,
Running the trot line?
I have a heavy foot,
Raw elbows,
Aching back,
Sore cheeks and
Swollen feet.
Rush on ahead little buddy,
Sweep the trail for me.

PALIN AND BACHMANN

Poorly informed,
Irrational,
Flapping mouths,
Embarrassment to their gender,
On a bright note,
They'll fragment the 2012 Republican ticket,
However,
Recalcitrant congressional members of that tribe,
Have already thoroughly pissed in their Wheaties,
In this case,
Not the breakfast of champions



Addendum: This piece was originally written about Sarah Palin, but the Tea Partiers have expanded their stable of equally odious candidates.

MY TIME

Professional confines,
Muzzled too long,
I've listend,
And listened,
And listened,
To "experts,"
Mostly men,
Who said little worth hearing.
After sixty years of hatching,
It's my time.
I am woman.
Hear my voice.
May it travel far.

SILENCE

Driving,
Silence,
Words drop like rain,
Cosmic downloading,
Juke and drive,
When the muse sings,
Listen.

LOOK OUT

Oklahoman headed to ocean,
Sea in nostrils,
Truck Stop Mama,
Gas,
Bathrooms,
$10 showers,
Parking well lit,
Sleep in car,
Good to go


Addendum:
All blogs since 8/8/11 were cosmic downloads during two solo, spring drives to North Carolina. The series continues with my ocean visits and return drives.

ENTITLEMENTS

Hey you,
The entitlement generation,
Get off your butts and go to work.
You've been powdered and diapered too long.
Baby-sat by computers, TVs and video games,
Not your fault your parents were asleep.
Time for you to hitch up and go.
I'm retiring.
I paid my social security.
The government spent it.
I'm entitled to get some back.
It's you turn.

MIDDLE CHILD

My daughter,
Navajo woman,
Finished high school,
Works hard,
Then goes home to her Hispanic husband,
Wonderful parents,
To their four children,
Who are bright and beautiful,
With black hair,
Black-brown eyes,
Bilingual,
Full of life,
Next generation's blossoms

MY ELDEST

A son,
Not speaking to me - again.
Have seen his two children once, in five years,
I'm being punished for writing about my childhood and "his grandparents."
Says it couldn't have happened, and
I'm the crazy one.
How would he know?
He wasn't there,
In those dark corridors of my life.
Says his grandparents were there when I wasn't.
Where was I?
Getting my brains out of hock

Such is life.
He lives in a bubble.
May it never burst.
But, if it does,
I'll be there,
Still loving him.

A BEAUTIFUL EVENING

My youngest son,
Handsome,
Gay,
Has fun playing drag queen,
Went to gay bar,
First time to see him perform,
Along with other lovelies,
Participated in the fun,
Tipped the dancers,
Introduced as Nicole's mother,
By my son's drag-queen mother,
Preparing to leave,
My son was obviously pleased by my presence.
Many others, with unfamiliar faces, hugged me.
The club owner, with tears in his eyes, thanked me for coming.
Then, I knew I had mothered and approved of them all.

HUMANITY

Ensconced in mall recliner - Demo, Dane Designs - I watch.
High-heeled woman struts in red, seeking to be chic.
Well-dressed man, with grey goatee, descends on escalator,
His noble demeanor slips as he carries sacks of food.
Many older, waddling women bear similar, plain descriptions.
Young, perky mothers carry babies.
With solicitude and care, an elderly woman, in red-plaid slacks, seats her feeble husband in nearby chair and heads off on mission.
Punked-up adolescent looking "cool" and shouting, "Who am I?"
Refreshingly wholesome, teenage girl pens job application.
Men, women and children walk to and fro.
Some erect, with strong strides, seemingly confident in their worldly niche.
Others, lost in life's maze, slouch in body and soul.
Most are in between, with glimpses of peace and clarity,
But more often than not, they put one foot in front of the other,
Hoping it treads on solid ground.

Upon rising, I join the walk.
To and fro we go, marching humanity.

YOUTH

Runway model in red,
Girl child masquerading as woman,
Eyes brightly painted,
Face powdered and rouged

What can she sell me at 64?

Do I desire her youth?
No.
I have done my work.
She has yet to do hers.

Do I want her face?
It took me these many years to love my own.
Why change now.

Do I envy her figure?
God, no.
I rejoice being without bra or bikini.
She remains hostage to womanhood's illusions.
Having shed those many barnacles,
I am free to be.
And, hopefully, someday, so shall she.

AMERICA

Nation of the rotund,
Home of the "Big Mac,"
The "Whopper" and
The "Happy Meal,"
Get them while they're young.
Obesity, an epidemic,
Swine flu got more press.
The silver-haired, cherub-cheeked mama,
The calorie queen,
Has another lush confection on her magazine cover.
At least, she's not skinny,
As she sells dietary death, with
High blood pressure,
Diabetes,
Hip and knee replacements,
Heart attacks and
Strokes.
All await you,
In America,
Land of the free.
That is, unless you're starving.

A HUMAN RIGHT

Health Care,
A Civil Right?
Absolutely!
Even more,
A human right,
What does it look like?
Less procedures,
Tests and
Gadgets,
With spurious results,
More physicians
Nurses and
Human caregivers,
Healing comes with being
Seen,
Heard and
Touched.
Eyes of compassion
Heal the body and the soul.

PHYSICIANS

Many begin with altruistic motives,
Others with dollar signs,
After long years of training,
Bloodied and beaten,
They arrive on the shores of doctordom,
Feeling entitled to a piece of the American
dream of more, more, more,
They build their practices.
But, as the years go by,
Their dream fades,
Their possessions own them.
Some realize,
"Less is more," and
"Enough is Enough."
Yes, they have helped people and
Loved and cried with many.
As retirement approaches,
Many ask themselves,
"What do I really want to be."

PHARMACEUTICAL COMPANIES

Drug dealers,
Sell,
Sell,
Sell,
New names with
SR, XR, LR,
Generic drugs repackaged,
With new patents,
New products with spurious results,
Feed on fear and suffering,
Like your neighborhood crack house

UNITED STATES

"United" States,
An oxymoron,
Richest nation on earth,
Higher death rate than Canada, France, Denmark ...
Fancier medicines,
With bigger price tags,
Machines with pretty pictures that
Sing,
Dance,
Tell jokes,
Their construction resembles penile fixation,
The biggest and the best,
Where is the Health Care?
Where is the human touch?
In the unemployment lines

GREED

Insurance Companies,
Organized crime,
Rape,
Pillage and
Fill politicians' pockets.
They don't cover most
Medicines,
Care or
Procedures.
Cheaper to let people die,
Top execs need
End-of-year bonuses,
Merry Christmas

HEADED TOWARD NASHVILLE

Gaylords have bastardized the Opry,
Just like my home state.
Plastered their name all over the place,
Like they owned us,
They do own a lot of Oklahoma stock,
Including the newspaper.
Stinks before the fish hit it,
Republican rag,
Feeds you lies,
While they steal you blind,
Something's real wrong,
With a family needing that much money.

TRUCKERS

Cross-country cowboys,
Follow the white lines,
Big hearts,
Melt like butter,
Lingo all their own,
Travel in pairs,
Sleep,
Drive,
Drive,
Sleep,
Make deliveries coast to coast,
Twenty-four-hour rolling machines

WEAVE AND PASS

He's got the hots to pass,
Peddle to the metal,
Addicted to speed?
Need to pee?
Got a hot date?
Won't matter,
When he's wrapped around a tree

EASTER EGGS

Children in their Easter finery,
Carrying baskets,
Hunting colored orbs,
Three-thousand years of patriarchy,
Horrified parents,
Would hustle them inside,
If they knew,
For thirty-thousand years prior,
Eggs symbolized the Divine Feminine,
The Goddess,
Rebirth,
Regeneration,
Instead of a dead man resurrected from a cross

EASTER SUNDAY

In his seventies,
Cruising in a snazzy, black Corvette,
Top off,
Silver mane blowing,
Christ has risen.

AMERICAN PRIDE

Mobile Home,
Big Sucker,
Cranked up to 80,
Bet it gets 3 miles a gallon,
Cost at least half a mill,
Could have educated lots of kids

TRUCK STOP

IRON SKILLET,
Time to eat,
Trucker hustling waitress,
Bullshit thick,
His eyes undressing her,
The primal monkey dance

THE NIGHT

Reflectors,
Lights,
Highway Ribbons,
Stripes,
Solids,
Beckon me,
Solitude on wheels

THE SUIT

Stuffed in suit,
Driving fast,
Looking tense,
In his sixties,
Sporty, red BMW,
Bought the illusion

CIVILIZATION

Cross-country drive,
Giant billboards screaming
XXX Adult Store,
Ethanol tainted petrol,
Hearts over signs selling sandwiches,
Roadside crosses named Billy, Bob and Charlotte.
Scenic route,
One-hundred miles of hell,
Traffic lights galore,
Road lined by chain food, gas, you name it.
"America the Beautiful"

INTRODUCTION TO ROLLING COMMENTARIES, 2011 EDITION

In my thirty-nine year medical career, I studied much, listened to many, reflected and synthesized. In 1996, the cosmic computer pressed print, and words began to flow through me and onto paper.

As I approach retirement, professional constraints are lifting, and all that I am can become visible. My favorite motto for this process is "let it rip."

I was reared in rural Oklahoma, a shameful fact in my young mind, so I attempted to eradicate my roots with education.

Even worse, I was born female, a birth defect in my patriarchal origins. Therefore, I had to be as good as or better than any man. Brains were my winning ticket.

After fifteen years of college and professional training and many years of living, I developed insight, into myself and others. When used for the highest good of all concerned, an educated mind is a blessing. However, there are many recipients of excellent educations with bloated egos, who spew forth on any and all topics, as if they were supreme authorities. Actually, they have barely skimmed the surface of true understanding or wisdom.

I am no longer impressed by any one's education or the amount of money in their bank account. I am more interested by the nature of their soul and their ability to be loving, kind and compassionate to all.

As the years passed, I came to value my country roots. Oklahomans' feet are firmly planted in the red earth. They also have good, common, horse sense and a belly-laughing sense of the absurd.

As for being a woman, I consider my gender to be one of my greatest assets. Women, more often than men, tend to listen to and follow their intuitions, their inner knowings. I, along with many others, consider intuition to be the highest form of intelligence and a direct extension of the collective unconscious, which is also called the Akashic Field and Divine Intelligence.

ROLLING COMMENTARIES: This title is based on my travels in life and on the planet. I spend much of my time in silence and solitude, my form of meditation, and a myriad of thoughts and topics flow into my consciousness.

In the springs and summers of 2009 and 2010, I travelled five times to the coast of North Carolina. The following series, which includes over fifty pieces, came to me during those travels. This series will be followed by many others.

The "Addendums" are personal notes made the date of the blog's post.

May your journeys be blessed.
Linda Bowlby, M.D.